So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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