Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
