ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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