Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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