He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
