So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Randomize
