Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Fuck appropriateness.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
