its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
