Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
