I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize