when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize