im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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