hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
