I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
