i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
