i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
