The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
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