the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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