who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Randomize
