He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want