Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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