I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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