No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Randomize
