Don't you send me to vm
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
