fuck your aforementioned shoe
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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