Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize