i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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