there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
my shit smells like andre
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Randomize
