rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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