dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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