I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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