Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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