I hate your face
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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