"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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