I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
