My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
