Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
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i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
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No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
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