There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
