end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
