The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
