I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I have post one night stand depression
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