Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Randomize
