some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
