whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
