Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
