Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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