Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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