I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize
