yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
