i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
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